Toil and Trouble
by SableUnstable
Summary: "Swelter'd venom sleeping got, boil thou first i' the charmed pot." James takes the Bard's words a little too literally. Halloween one-shot, James/Remus, pre-slash.


**Toil and Trouble**

 **Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter or Macbeth by William Shakespeare.

 **Prompt:** James/Remus – scale of dragon, tooth of wolf. Given to me by the wonderful **disillusionist9** and originally posted on Tumblr.

 **A/N –** A heads-up, good readers: this would have to be the least Halloween-y Halloween fic ever written. All right, I'm (probably) exaggerating, but still, it ain't at all spooky. No spook to be found here. Just friendship, fluff, and pre-slash, taking place on Halloween night. I had fun writing it though, so I hope you too enjoy! Happy Halloween! :)

* * *

Remus heard the muttering before he'd even reached the door.

"I don't understand how this'll work. Sure, a lot of it makes sense, but nose of Turk and Tartar's lips? That's horrible! And what the hell is a blaspheming Jew? Oh, wait, we learned about that in muggle studies, didn't we? But why the liver of a blaspheming Jew in particular? Wouldn't an ordinary Jew work? Why the bloody hell do you need a human liver in the first place?!"

Stopping dead as the muttering continued, amusement had a smile pulling at Remus's lips before a ripe curse followed by a hopeless groan got him moving again. The sight that met him when he opened his bedroom door had a full-blown grin spreading across his face – that is until he saw the state of his room.

"James, what the bloody hell do you think you're doing?"

"Moony!" James yelped, sounding panicked as he threw himself up off the floor, where he'd been lying with his forearm draped dramatically over his eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I'd think that since I've been told to consider this room my own while I'm here, I _would_ be allowed within its walls," Remus said dryly, eyes scanning the spread out potions kit, the pewter cauldron, and the book lying half open on the floor next to James. Dismay grew as he pieced it together. "You weren't actually going to try making a potion in here, were you? Prongs! You'll burn the place down!"

"No I won't!" James said indignantly, his head still facing Remus while his upper body did a weird, complicated twist that looked more than a little painful, his hand scrambling across the plush carpet behind him. "I make potions in my room all the time when school's out and we're all still okay!"

"Yes, something I assume Dorea sees too," Remus said, amusement flooding him again as he watched his friend try his best to hide the book that'd been lying beside him behind his back. "You do realise that I've already seen that, and that trying to hide it now is a rather fruitless venture?"

James froze for a moment and then licked his lips. "Seen what?" he asked, all innocence, both hands now firmly tucked behind his back. He wiggled a little, hazel eyes wide behind his glasses and focused entirely on Remus. Remus smirked a him and folded his arms, a sandy-blond brow rising pointedly.

"The book you're currently trying to shove down the arse of your trousers. Come on, Prongs. And you call yourself a Marauder?"

A strange combination of disgust and frustration rippled across James's face at Remus's comment, and with a gusty sigh, he reluctantly pulled the book out of his trousers and brought it into view, grimacing a bit when Remus frowned and took it from him.

"Macbeth? James, I didn't know you knew Shakespeare."

"I don't," James grumbled, turning with a sigh and scooping up his potions kit, a disgruntled expression on his face. He didn't look at Remus as he carefully reassembled the kit. "I found it next to your bed and the chapter you'd marked caught my eye. And, well, you seemed really disappointed when Minnie wouldn't let Padfoot and Wormtail come with us, and I know you really like Halloween… I just thought it'd be fun to make that potion for the occasion, all right?"

Blinking a little in surprise, Remus glanced down at the book and opened it to the chapter he'd bookmarked the previous night before he'd gone to sleep. The three witches and their otherworldly chanting jumped off the page, and the meaning behind the muttering he'd heard earlier as he'd approached the door suddenly became clear.

"For a hell-broth boil and bubble," he murmured, looking up and grinning slightly, tickled beyond belief. "Prongs, this isn't a potion."

James paused in his fiddling with his repacked kit. "It's not?"

"No," Remus said, shaking his head. "It's not a spell either. Shakespeare was a magician with words, true, but he was a muggle in every other way… at least I think he was. I wonder if that's ever been confirmed? Anyway, nothing would've happened even if you'd managed to nick some eye of newt and toe of frog from your mum's potion stores. Not in this case. This particular charm isn't actually one of powerful trouble, I'm afraid to say."

James's head was still down, his eyes locked on his potions kit. When he eventually did look up, the stamp of blatant disappointment on his face had Remus smiling. "Of course it isn't," James muttered, sighing and spearing a hand through his hair. "Sorry, Moons, I just… I wanted you to have fun while you're here, since we're missing out on the fun at school and all, and that book looks like it's been read numerous times…"

"That's because it has," Remus said, smile widening. "But it isn't the right type of book we should be looking at, is it?" With a skip in his step, he hurried towards his closet and yanked the doors open, rummaging around in his magically extended duffle bag and pulling out something with barely exaggerated triumph. " _This_ is the book we should be reading."

All it took was one glance at the cover for James to grin widely and chuck Remus's now forgotten copy of Macbeth onto his neatly-made bed. He was still grinning an hour or so later as he threw roll after roll of loo paper into the trees in the backyard of a house that hadn't had any treats when the two boys, dressed in ordinary t-shirts and jeans, had come calling – but then, of course they hadn't.

The Carrows were purebloods, after all.

"Muggles are brilliant!" James hissed at Remus, his face alight with mischief as he began plucking never-ending eggs out of his jeans pockets. Remus laughed and did the same, the book _Tricks are Better than Treats: The Best Ways to Make the Most of your Halloween_ tossed on the grass at their feet. "You're coming with me to next year's Hallowe'en celebration too! Who needs magic when simplicity beats a wand any day?"

Remus chuckled quietly and lobbed an egg, a thrill running through him when he heard the distinct sound of a shell/goo combo exploding against brick. "Whatever you do, don't tell Sirius that," he said, grinning at James when the Potter heir snorted, smirked as he side-eyed Remus, and then nodded in agreement.


End file.
